The Letter
by MouHitoriNoKei
Summary: My second song fic. This time, to BSB's 'How Did I Fall In Love With You?' Get a tissue ready ^.^ Please R+R


Pop singers just seem to have songfic ideas for me. ^_^ Well, please enjoi. R+R is appreciated. 

"How Did I Fall In Love With You?"  
  
**[Remember when, we never needed each other  
The best of friends like  
Sister and Brother  
We understood, we'd never be,  
Alone]**

Dearest Kagome,

By the time these meaningless words are read, I will be gone, gone into the distant night. Kagome, you may wonder why, why I chose to take this way out. And, the answer is unknown. I just want you to know as I write this, I am only thinking of you, thinking of the times we shared. Do you remember when we first met? I remember it like it was just yesterday...The gentle sun was looking down on you as you walked up to my helpless body, and yet, you showed no fear towards the dog demon before you. Later that night, with Mistress Centipede, again, you showed no fear and you freed me from the eternal prison of Kikyo. I emerged, and though I tried to kill you, you stuck by me, but why? I always wanted to ask you why you did that. I guess you're just a mystery, huh?

Time passed and we grew closer, closer then I ever imagined. I never thought a human, besides my mother, would enter my life and make such a change. My hands pushed you away, though my heart wanted you to stay.  
  
**[Those days are gone, and I want so much  
The night is long and I need your touch  
Don't know what to say  
I never meant to feel this way  
Don't want to be  
Alone tonight]**

Those long days soon turned to cold nights. Though I wasn't alone, truly, I was. My heart wouldn't allow me to hold you as closely as I wanted to and whisper those dear sweet words into your ear. I was being held back by something, Kikyo. The mistress of fate has not been happy with me. She had sent you to me, and I contradicted her, being blinded still by Kikyo's undying shadow. I didn't want our relationship to go any farther then finding the Shikon shards, but, it did, and I won't regret thinking the things I did......  
  
**_[chorus:_  
What can I do, to make it right  
Falling so hard so fast this time  
What did I say, what did you do?  
How did I fall in love with you?]**

You've never left my mind, in all the days you left to your world. Every time you left, I was always thinking of ways to break it off, tell you I didn't need your help. Yet, I couldn't. You had ensnared me in the trap they call love, and I embraced every moment of it. Why you, Kagome? Why was it you who I loved and not Kikyo? Kikyo caused me pain, but not as much as you. I guess it's my fault, anyway. I thought I could keep you in my hands forever, gently holding you and cherishing you, but my own demon heart wouldn't let me. Was it you or was it me, that made me feel this kind of pain and anguish?   
  
**[I hear your voice  
And I start to tremble  
Brings back the child that, I resemble  
  
I cannot pretend, that we can still be friends  
Don't want to be,  
Alone tonight]**

Why was it love that tore us apart, instead of bringing us together? The only love I can remember was from my mother, the purest of all loves, besides the love you have shown me. My mother, the most beautiful and tender creature of all, purest of the heart and of the mind. She held me when I was a child, and I always felt safe. I felt as if I were an equal despite me being only half of what my father was. In your arms, I feel as if I'm equal. When I'm with you, the world has to accept what I am, no matter what their words may say. I can only smile at the fact that you accept me for the hanyou that I am. Please, never change. Always remain by my side, both in life and death.  
  
**_[chorus:_  
What can I do, to make it right  
Falling so hard so fast this time  
What did I say, what did you do?  
How did I fall in love with you?]**

Fate has dealt me something I can't deal with, the reality of me not being able to have you all to myself. Why? I would ask myself at night while you were peacefully sleeping at my side. Staring at the moon, I would use the stars to count my reasons for loving you, but one night, I ran out of stars. It amazed me, to know that I loved you that much, but I couldn't tell you. Emotions, eating me up inside. The moon mocked me, knowing I couldn't break down the barrier around my heart so I could happily invite you in to stay. No, I couldn't do that, nor will I ever be able to. I've been struck down by my own selfishness, and only your gentle hand could help me up.   
  
**[_Bridge:_  
Oh I want to say this right  
And it has to be tonight  
Just need you to know, oh yeah]**

I knew this night had to come sometime. I only wish I could have prepared myself better for it. As I left late in the night, I looked over to you as you slept, undisturbed by my own selfishness and greed. Your ebony hair sat softly against your angelic face and I could only look on helplessly, longing to touch that face. I left you alone, something that was hard enough, but to rely on the moon to be your guardian hurt me. Kagome, I need you to be the first to know why. 

  
**[I don't want to live this life  
I don't want to say goodbye  
With you I wanna spend  
The rest of my life]**

I've caused you pain, I've caused you injury, and for that, I cannot be forgiven. Death almost took you away, but only because of the luck I held, you remained in the living world. I don't want to cause you or your family anymore pain. I don't want you to feel anymore heartache over my trivial existence, yet, I don't want to leave you here alone, alone in this world that is full of hate and pain. I want to live by your side forever, but Fate has decided, I can't. I want to hold you close each night, hearing each gentle breath, feeling each heartbeat. If not for this painful choice, I would ask you to be my wife, for now and forever, in this world, and the next. I would ask you to love me as much as I love you, hoping to remain in your heart for as long as it would provide me with loving shelter from the hatred that surrounds me.   
  
**[_chorus:_  
What can I do, to make it right  
Falling so hard so fast this time  
What did I say, what did you do?  
How did I fall in love with you?]**

I've fallen into a pit of despair, choices needing to be made, and Fate has decided this for me, my hollow words never making a difference. I wish I could change what happened between us, Kagome. I wish I could take back all the hurtful words that ever escaped my lips and entered your ears. You're beautiful and charming, and for a brief moment, you were mine. For a moment, I could call you my woman, being able to depend on you for anything. If only those moments could be preserved in the annals of time, my dear. If only life and love wasn't as cruel as this.   
  
**[What can I do, to make it right  
Falling so hard so fast this time  
Everything's changed, we never knew]**

Did I know I was going to fall in love with the human who came through the enchanted well? No. It never came to mind that the woman who stole my heart would also be the one to make me feel different, to make me feel more alive. You changed me for the better, Kagome. I no longer needed the Shikon jewel to make me powerful. You had already given me everything I needed to make me who I was, and for that, I thank you. I only wish the effect of your kindness wore on forever, but forever never came for us, Kagome.   
**  
[How did I fall,  
in love ,  
with you?]**

I now say my goodbyes, Kagome. I wish you well in this life, and the next, and the next. I only hope I can remain a distant but beloved memory in your heart. I love you, Kagome. Please, don't forget that. All the insults and egotistic statements only hid the true feelings I had for you, and stupidly, I never let my true feelings shine through like the guiding stars which watch over me as I write this. This was my only escape, and I hope you understand why I did this. Love is such a fragile thing, and I've but finally realized this. Not after Kikyo, but after you. Never forget the hanyou who loved you..........Never forget how I fell in love with you, and never forget that I will always be here, even if my soul is wandering amongst those of my father and my mother....

Love Always,

Inuyasha

_Kagome only read this, holding back the tears that longed to be cried. "Inuyasha..." She whispered, realizing that the man she loved had done the unthinkable.... "Why, Inuyasha? Why would you leave me?" She dropped to her knees, the note falling out of her tearstained hands. "Inuyasha, I love you too, and I always will, even if death had stolen you from me........"_


End file.
